Sunday, September 27, 2015

President Of US - The Candidates

The most powerful person on planet earth is said to be the president of United States. Now who on earth would not like to be in his shoes? I guess this is being taken too seriously by some of the Americans who have already thrown in their hat in the race. Donald Trump is one such name. This filthy rich real estate magnate is wooing Americans to adorn him with the coveted tiara of the President of United States. To many, his rise in the popularity is no less than a surprise even after a series of goof ups and foot in the mouth statements. It would be interesting to envisage him as the president of the US in the future. With his arrival, what would the White House look like? Or would be turned into? The options are many and worth taking a “dekho”
Mr. Donald Trump

He being a hardcore real estate magnate, he might continue being one and continue his real estate dealings from White House. To every visiting delegation he would put forward a new proposition of buying properties in their country, and same would be offered to them in US. The land mafia worldwide would have a gala time. The world would get to see at least one Trump tower in every country. Country leaders who oppose this move would face trade embargo and face black listed until and unless the opposition has diminished or decimated. More importantly some of the Indian politicians who have voracious greed for real estate and property would have permanent residence in the White House at the behest of Mr. Trump. Isn’t it amazing? In the remotest area of India, boards claiming “This Land belongs to Mr. Trump”, “Trespassers would be prosecuted” would be ubiquitous. Countries requiring arms and ammunition from US would have to let go prime properties in their countries to Mr. President, Mr. Trump. It won’t be a surprise if the world get to see a billboard outside White House saying promoters and builders Mr. Donald Trump. If this is not enough lot of wannabe job seekers would walk into White House to be an Apprentice. This would include professionals from various industries like IT, hospitality, real estate, entertainment, marketing and many more. It would be a common sight to stumble upon Patel’s in the long queues outside the White House. All in all realty business across the world and especially in US would get a major boost with Mr. Trump occupying the White House.
Mr. Kanye West
There are many others who want to be the most powerful person in the world. In the long list of dreamers, one name stands out. He is none other than, the undisputed king of Rap, who is notoriously popular for PDA’s with his socialite wife Kim Kardashian. He is, yes you have guessed it right, Kanyeeeee Westtttttt. Are you surprised? Even I was, when I read his wish, to contest the future Presidency of the United States. He says United States need creative people in the White House and he is one.A BIG LOL moment isn’t it? I have not heard such an amazzing joke in recent times. Thanks Kanye you tickled my funny bone and had me in splits. You are SUPERBBBBB. But But folks it would be fun as well, just imagine what you can expect with the celebrity couple in the White House. The oval office in the White House would be the most used place. Remember the name Monica? Kanye and Kim’s PDA’s and sexapades would make the house spicy and colorful again. They would give the porn king Hugh Hefner a run for the money. Most importantly these acts of intimacy would delight the voyers world wide. Formal dressing would be a thing of past, and garish, nude dressing would be in vogue. Plunging necklines and reducing hemlines would be the order of the day with the power couple leading the pack. Many world leaders who had a tiff with US would say let bygones be bygones and would like to extend a hand and roving eye towards the celebrity couple, Kim Kardashian, the first lady would be the most loved lady worldwide. I am not surprised!!!!. Isn’t it a harbinger of world peace? Music industry in the US would get unprecedented support and it won’t be a surprise if MTV award function is held at the White House. Rap music would get the cult status and every rapper would be awarded the highest civilian award in the US, even the US national anthem would be composed again to a rap tune. A beautiful, creative, lively world named kkimtopia would come into being. HURRAYYYYY. BRAVOOO, ZAKASSSS.
Mr. Piyush "Bobby" Jindal
Last but not least, how can I forget our very own Piyush “Bobby” Jindal? Oh “Quelle Catastrophe”, I referred to him as our very own. My sincere Apologies. How could I forget, he does not like to be called a HYPHENATED American? He is an American and a pure American, put that in your head, always. What if he dons the cap of a US president? It would be night mare for everything and everyone associated with India. Anyone even accidently calling him an Indian American would be guillotined in Time Square and broadcasted worldwide. Yes guillotined, a gift from the French besides French kiss. All Indian festivals celebrated with fanfare in the White House would be stopped immediately. There would be great propensity of India born tech honchos losing their jobs and sent back to India. Relations between US and India can plunge to all time low with heavy sanctions slapped on India. Even a great probability of arming Pakistan against India won’t be ruled out, in doing so he would convince, almost certainly, the senate that he is not an Indian-American.

If Modi continues to be Indian PM in those times, he would simply avoid going to the White House. Who would like to get insulted and listen to anti-India rants? Mr. Jindal wishes to forget his Indian roots, so be it. While he does this he thinks he has better chance to show Americans how American he is and in turn convince them to vote an American to the White House. Our best wishes to Mr. Bobby Jindal.

The allure to be the next US president has affected many and they are playing every trick in the trade to enter the White House to be the most powerful man on this planet.

Note: The above stories are figment of my wild imagination and not to be taken seriously.

Sunday, September 20, 2015

The Exodus

In recent times, the newspapers, TV is full of disturbing scenes of hordes of refugees from war ravaged nations in west Asia and Africa taking the arduous, life threatening odyssey to reach Europe. A land they think would offer a new lease of life, where they can live peacefully and prosper. While some of them have managed to win a small war and reach the destination, some unfortunate lost all they had including the dear ones. The sight of little Aylan drowned in the seas was heart wrenching, disturbing. The unfortunate father who in the hope of giving good life to his family, lost his two sons and his wife while making an audacious journey towards the sought after land. There are many such who are being tested by destiny while they leave the treacherous, painful past behind, in search of new hope. Tens of thousands of people from Syria, Africa, and Afghanistan are taking a gamble to reach the destination that they think would offer good quality of life and it’s Europe. These poor, helpless souls are seen sailing in small boats, dinghy’s to reach the shores of Greece from where they can enter the land of their dreams. The middle men, the Dalals’s are having a field day, looting these helpless people with a promise to help them reach Europe. In doing so scant regard is given to the safety of these people who along with their toddlers are risking their lives. No wonder, daily, the news of the boats, capsizing in the seas make the headlines.

War and War

Back home the wannabe immigrants have been suffering for decades due to civil wars, military coups, fanaticism. Their life is no less than hell in these war torn, ravaged countries. Killings in hundred’s, daily, is a norm in these butcher houses. The young ones, the future of these countries are brandishing rocket launchers, AK 47 when they should be playing with toys. The seeds of vengeance and hatred are sowed in their innocent minds when they see their parents, family members being gunned down, killed by extremists, the perpetrators. Some time back I read a very disturbing article about the Syrian, Yemeni kids who were displaced from their homes by the war. When interviewed, these young ones talked about avenging the atrocities meted out to them and their families. The minds of these innocents are already corrupted with the thought of revenge. This vicious circle will lead nowhere but death, death and death, but do they really have an option? I am not sure about the authenticity of this story, but it goes like this. People from different continents who had suffered a lot due to wars, famine, drought, crimes met god and complained about the state of affairs in their countries and asked when they would see the back of this pain and misery? The god smiled and said it’s just matter of time when peace, harmony and joy would return to your lives. It was time for an Arab to tell the almighty what his country, land is going through, the perennial pain, death and misery. He wanted to know when people of his land would see the day of light and defeat their pain, God heard his plea patiently but had tears in his eyes. The Arab got his answer, and this has been the case till date.

Europe Here We Come

To free themselves from despair, pain, agony, these sufferers are risking their lives to set foot on the land, which they think would heal their pains. Many European nations have acknowledged this cry for help and have open their borders to accommodate these immigrants. Germany is leading the pack followed by Austria, Greece, UK, Sweden who have also opened their arms without any prejudice, though some countries namely Hungary, Croatia etc. are proving to be villains when they closed their borders on these refugees. But branding them villains would be myopic. Showing solidarity, humaneness in these circumstances is warranted, but they are just trying to protect its own people from the onslaught of thousands of refugees, which can change the demography of their country. They are envisaging problems ahead when these culturally different people enter their society. Time would tell if their decision was right or otherwise. On the other side countries like Germany who had reported many xenophobic incidents in the past have openly welcomed their homes, land to these refugees. It would be interesting to see how these immigrants assimilate in their new home. While Europe has welcomed the refugees, the Arab world from where these people come from, have not shown the same alacrity as others and this is disturbing. It has put a serious question mark on their solidarity for their own people.

TODO Big Brother !!!

While other nations are doing their bit to accommodate these homeless people, serious thought, backed with action need to be taken up by the powerful nations in stemming the exodus from these west Asian and African nations. They need to do everything possible to stop the war in these regions so that people don’t have to leave their homes. The war mongers need to be decimated and environment for parleys and peace talks need to be created. This should be done selflessly without any ulterior motives, or else history is full of cases where the actions have boomeranged. It is time for the powerful nations to show their BIG BROTHERLY instincts and stop this carnage which has led to this exodus. As an international citizen and a well-wisher of these poor souls, I can only wish them a HAPPY JOURNEY.