Thursday, September 15, 2016

A Crackpot Named Kim Jong Un

It can’t get bizarre than this. A crackpot named Kim Jong Un, yes the despot, megalomaniac of North Korea has banned “SARCASM” in his country. Yes, you have read it right, Can you believe someone doing this? Or rather I would say a Dumbo like him can only do such bizarre, incredulous thing. It won’t be surprising if next thing he bans is oxygen. No one in his country accept him and his ass licking followers will be allowed to inhale oxygen, anyone dis obeying his diktats would be in front of the firing squads. There have been numerous dictators in the past who had penchant for weird things. Augusto Pinochet of Chile, Idi Amin of Uganda, Pol Pot of Cambodia, Saddam Hussain of Iraq or Muammar Gaddafi of Libya, Nicolae Ceausescu of Romania and many others. They ruled with an iron fist for years and treated people like their slaves, but that was past, I cannot imagine a dictator in today’s age, though we still have a few, and one of them is this weird looking tyrannical leader named Kim Jong Un. He took over the reins from his father, Kim Jong Il who like wise ruled North Korea like his own property paying no heed to his citizens cries. The irony is, North Korea is also called DPRK (Democratic????? Peoples Republic of Korea).

Meri Marzi

Kim Jong Un is known to be a whimsical guy who kills people as per his whims and fancies. He is supposed to have executed many of his uncles because he smelled something fishy. If this was not enough, only recently he executed one of his army’s top general because he did not pay due respect to him during a meeting, his fault was, the general was dozing in the meeting room. I prefer this law implemented in India, so that we can get rid of some useless, good for nothing sycophants who either sleep, watch porn or talk about homely chores in the parliament. Coming back to this tyrant named Un, he has been leading a plush life while the citizens die of hunger and poverty. Only the elite also known as “Special” as per their 5 social statuses are allowed to live in the capital city of Pyongyang rest are forced to stay in other places which are far from decent. No outside media is allowed to peep into his kingdom and report his transgressions. He continues to isolate North Korea from the rest of the world and in doing so forces the citizens to obey to his caprices. It has also been reported in media, that he makes his citizens sing peans in his name when confronted by the outside world, just to let the world now how happy people of North Korea are under his rule. A tactic even the cruel Saddam Hussain employed time and again. The world fails to understand his shenanigans and how people of North Korea tolerate him. But I guess the answer lies in his atrocities, slightest hint of coup against him and his rule is dealt with severely.

Kim Jong Un
Kim Jong Un - The killer Look

Kim Jong Un's repertoire

Now the question is, how is he and his machinery going to check if someone is being sarcastic? Have they invented a device for this? Or even this is going to be according to his whims? I tell you he is one obnoxiously funny, fat, bugger, who comes up with these funny ideas. BTW he is not the only tyrant who ordered draconian diktats, Gaddafi, Saddam and others had their strange methods to keep a strict tab on its citizens and punish them for any aberrations. Nicolae Ceausescu found Scrabble games subversive and evil, and hence were banned during his time. Kim has control over personal choices of people as well, for instance, North Koreans are restricted to follow state-approved hairstyles but men are especially encouraged to copy Kim Jong-un 'ambitious' undercut crop, while women are urged to copy his wife, Ri Sol-ju's style. Isn’t it weird? But that’s North Korea and it’s not going to change for generations to come. Kim Jong Un has the audacity to cross swords even with the US and other world powers and pays no heed to their threats of sanctions or military action. He is happy doing his own things (read developing WMDs) and torment his gullible and helpless citizens. He treats North Korea as his fiefdom. It is spoken in hush hush voices, that people of North Korea are fed up of the Kim’s, who since long have been tormenting them, but the truth is, his cruelty and despotic ways do not seem to cease in years to come. God Help North Korea and its people. Some of troubling facts about North Korea:
  1. It is the 2nd most corrupt state in the world, only Somalia is a notch above them
  2. The regime scrapped the Gregorian calendar in 1997, replacing it with the Juche calendar, which is based on Kim Il-sung's date of birth, April 15 1912.
  3. 40% of children and pregnant women are malnourished.
  4. Every new born falls into one of its social statuses depending on the status of the father
  5. Special and 'nucleus', which are assigned to the elite, and get to enjoy luxuries while as 'basic', 'complex' and the sinister 'hostile' are the less privileged.
  6. Person perpetrating against him, faces the music along with his extended family and the next 2 generations under the 'three generations of punishment' law.
  7. The state decides jobs for its citizens when they leave high school and they cannot change them unless they have money to bribe the state machinery.
  8. Now this is funny, In North Korea blue jeans are banned because the color is associated with United States, its bête noir. People are allowed to wear black jeans though.

The list goes on and on highlighting the plight of normal citizens of North Korea. We should thank god that we are not North Koreans.

"This is all America’s fault"
"A fool who cannot see the outside world,"

are some mocking expressions which can result in saying bye bye to life in North Korea

*Stats taken from

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